Delhi was a lot different place than my imagination. It didn't make me to feel it's a city or country enough. I can't say no if I didn't disappoint. But I know it is my own selfish mind that I put Delhi in my own definition. It was like same thing I did on China. I had this huge expectation from the last scene from the movie The Last Emperor. It was my fault and I should know better at this time.
In the middle of nowhere of thousands of kilometers away from Delhi, small tea house on the road and a small town I visit, finally I met the India I drew on my mind. I was an alien to them. I look different to them and cloths I wearing and my language are also unfamiliar to them. They were wearing full of curiosities, sweetest shyness and priceless kindnesses. They were all so beautiful through my viewfinder and my heart. Middle age tea guy with a huge scar on his belly was smiling through making his meticulous tea making. While I was having the tea, two old man came to me asked a photo of them to take. I don't know how often those two old men take photos. They approached me and I could understand what they were asking without any translations. The minute I raised my camera, they became frozen turkey on the pose and the face, even the air around them. It seemed so sweet. Probably chance of taking photos are so rare to them. I wanted to show the photo but they didn't even checked their photo and just left. Probably they didn't even know there's a screen on the camera. I am yet not ready to offer anything to them and feel so sorry to them.
I leave their life momentarily from my short visit. And it's like a small peaceful water in a paddle and I was the one jumped in and made it muddy. My apologetic smile was all over my face while I was watching through all the photos. I used to think that I'd be so happy if I have this one and if I get that one, my life would be a lot nicer. But it never made me satisfy and just led me to another unnecessary needs. 1980's through my childhood, my mom made reddish soup Kimchi all the time. That was the only thing that we could eat with poor quality steamed rice. I was unhappy all the time. I was angry at my mom why we don't eat meat. After all I spent those times not understanding my mom and desiring other people's lunches and dinners. Now I know she wanted to feed us with all the good things but we couldn't afford. Life was tough. I'm all grew up now and understood what her heart was like. I appreciates my mom. Now I know her foods worth every single spoon full of that soup.
The Kimchi that summer my mom made was most affecting and thankful one. It still is. The smiles I capture on this journey is most humble and yet precious smiles. Those smiles that people I met on the road gave are still flickering on my eyes like tea stain on my shirt that impossible to remove.